Let’s face it, Farts are funny. Actually, farts are downright hilarious. I don’t know many guys (me included) who don’t snicker at the sound of a “blast.”
To be honest, even as I write this article, I cannot help but have a smile on my face when I think about it. From the time we are little kids, we think that farts and burps are hysterical. It never really seems to fade with age.
There are a lot of things we men do that we think are “ok.”
Believe it or not, our wives, girlfriends, or significant others may not think some of the things we do are the sexiest. Many of them will not actually let us know how much things we do (or don’t do) really turn them off.
1. Farts: Don’t Cook Her in Your Dutch Oven– Yes, that’s right guys. I know it is tough to resist that temptation when you feel those farts “brewing” while lying in bed together. When you feel the need to make that bedtime fart blast, make sure you get up and go elsewhere. The bedroom is where the “magic” happens. Nothing can turn a woman off faster than sharing your “stink” with her. No farts allowed in the bedroom.
2. Take Some Clippers to those Nose Hairs and Maybe Some Other Areas– When you are having a conversation with your woman she is doing more than just listening to you. She is hearing the tone in your voice, observing your facial features, and watching your mannerisms. The last thing you want your woman to notice is a forest of nose hairs that desperately need to be trimmed. It can definitely kill the mood. When you aren’t doing the little things like trimming up the nose hairs, she will start to wonder what else you have been neglecting on the “hygiene front.” As for those “other areas,” you don’t have to go “nuts.” No need to go to the Brazilian or waxing extreme. Just make sure the landscape looks nice and neat.
3. Underwear with Holes Need to GO- Sometimes the most comfortable underwear are the ones that have the most miles. On the other hand, if you have a “BIG-OLE HOLE” or several holes in those Underoos, it is time to throw them out. Nothing can be a bigger turn off to a woman than seeing something hanging out of your underwear that should otherwise be contained.
4. Good Old Fashion Manners and Consideration for Others– Obviously, women are very aware of how we treat them. However, they are also very keenly aware of how we treat and interact with others. It can be a definite turn off when she sees you being rude to your server in a restaurant or the cashier behind the counter. Women are proud to be with a man who knows how to treat and interact with people in a positive way.
5. Don’t Poop with the Door Open- This really needs no explanation. No woman will want to sleep with you right after she caught a glimpse of you squatting on the toilet. Plus, it doesn’t smell very good and the farts echo. You may like your own “brand,” but I would bet she doesn’t. If chili was for dinner, close that door and flip on the fan.
6. When She Talks…Listen…Really Listen- Women can always tell when we are 100% tuned in. It’s a huge turn off when they can tell our minds are elsewhere. Men are extremely visual and it doesn’t take much to get our engines going. However, for most women, foreplay starts with a connected conversation.
At times, balancing the complexities of being a Dad and a significant other can be daunting. When we throw raising kids into the mix, a lot of attention to detail can fall by the wayside. Dads are pulled in several directions and we juggle a lot. It’s so easy to lose sight of the little things from time to time.
Dads are not perfect. But being a Good Dad and Good Significant Other is not about being perfect. It’s about being the best version of ourselves so we can enjoy our lives and the relationships with the women in our lives. Farts are still funny, but farts are better when they are not shared with our woman.
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